The Curveball

Remember when I said I was going to start blogging full-time again? Yeah… so much for that nonsense. Girlfriend sure is slackin' over here. But for good reason. 

I've sort of just been living in that land of struggle where your personal life is going swimmingly well and you don't quite know how, or if, really, you should be merging all of it into your blog's life. The dilemma is really real when it comes to this thing known as lifestyle blogging because the only thing I really share here is, umm, my life and all the things going on in it. So what in the hell do you do when you don't wan't to talk about your life and all the things going on in it?

In my case, you basically just stop blogging. Whoops.

But when your head gets all clogged up with newfound happies, your initial reaction is to want to pour them all out and show how great of a hand you've been dealt. But that's also quite the gamble in a world full of Judgey McJudgertons, so the best move is to probably just pull a Lady Gaga and put on your poker face. Which I think I'm probably going to do for a while. 

Although that is quite the cock tease, so let's just say that I'm 100 and 70,000% shocked that I've been able to do a complete 180 since my break up post five weeks ago.

Five. Weeks. Ago. 

Phew, that feels like an entire eternity ago at this point. Because now I'm pretty much just thanking all  my lucky stars above, each and every day, that all of that hell went down. And especially when it did. Because at five weeks ago, I was severely depressed thinking about how I wasn't going to be able to live out the life I had planned for my future. And now, today, I just get depressed thinking about how I could've so easily been handed that life… because that would've meant that I never would've found this new one I'm currently living. And I rather like this one I'm currently living.

Good God. Who am I? 

That's the question I've been asking myself these past couple weeks. Because I'm seriously in so much disbelief as to how easy it was for me to climb out of that dark hole, which we can now title, "Moping Around Watching Rerun After Rerun of That 70's Show in Whitney's Apartment While Downing Glasses of Wine and Snuggling Ella" two days after the break up, to now finding my sunshine and skipping down the street in my Hunter boots again. And I don't really know why I feel the need to let everyone know that my mindset is back on track to thinking about puppy snuggles all day, but I do.

Maybe for my own sanity? Maybe for anyone else out there that is moping around thinking they'll never feel normal again? (Newsflash: you will) I'm not entirely sure what the rhyme or reason is for this post. All I know is that life has a crazy ass way of throwing you a curveball when you least expect it.

There couldn't be any truer words for me at this moment. So for anyone going through something similar to what my life was like those five long weeks ago, I hope you try to keep the faith. Because in the words of Ellen DeGeneres as Dory, "JUST KEEP SWIMMING". And maybe you too will be thanking life for your very own curveball one day.

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