A Two Thirds Hazel Q&A Sesh

There was once a time when Karli from September Farm asked me a bunch of random different questions. I obviously love a girl that knows how to do random, because that's pretty much my middle name around this blogging world. So enjoy the ride of odd questions that have nothing to do with each other today. You might just get to know me a tiny bit better.

1. Have you ever been in a girl fight?
Surprisingly, yes. With a girl I now consider one of my best friends. Although she obviously wasn't that at the time things went down. 

I was dating this deuche canoe that was deathly allergic to monogamy (see also: was a complete man-slut). I found out he was cheating on me with this girl who obviously wasn't my friend at the time, and then ended up being the crazy looney toon that I was back then and bitch-tapped (not so much a slap, but not so much a puppy snuggle either) the girl on the cheek. Basically the complete opposite of this:

But then both of us grew up and realized that the d-canoe was the problem in our little love triangle of hellish immaturity instead of each other, so we joined forces, ditched him, and became best friends. Girl power!

2. Any scary moments in NYC?
Unfortunately yes. If you ever ride the subway in NYC, you'll sometimes hear announcements on the overhead speakers saying something like "Packed subway cars are not an excuse to inappropriately touch fellow subway riders." Or something. I always thought they were somewhat of a silly joke;  something that would never happen. That is until it did. To me. 

I was on an extremely packed car and some guy was pushed right up against my back. He kept bumping into my ass, but hey, the subway isn't the smoothest of rides so I tried to brush it off like he was accidentally doing it whenever we hit a bump. But then the train stopped and there were no more bumps, he reached all the way up with his hand into my crotch area and grabbed me. Sorry for the graphic details but it was absolutely as horrifying as it sounds. I screamed. Punched him in the back several times while chasing after him, and then lost him in the crowd on the subway platform. People are sick. So watch your back, err, butt, if you ride the subway.

3. Phone, internet, or fruits and veggies - which would you give up?
Phone, duh. I hate the phone, remember? Plus who in their right mind could ever give up strawberries or corn or potatoes or carrots dipped in hummus or watermelon or smoothies?

4. Are you a fan of your blog? Do you wonder why people read it?
Oh boy. Sometimes I think I'm creative and/or witty. 99% of those times I'm also delusional. So 100% of the time, yes, I absolutely do wonder why people read this thing. I'm just your average twenty something who binges on Netflix instead of going on exciting adventures. It's not a life that's too thrilling over here too often. 

Before I had a blog I stalked the shit out of Jessica Garvin. I would literally hit the refresh button on her page at least ten times a day hoping for a new chalkboard bump update. Little Baby Gavin dot blogspot dot com was my version of Walter White's blue meth. I was completely addicted and couldn't wait for my next dose. I look back now and ask myself why I didn't run straight to therapy. I mean, I'm seriously such a freak. But I can't for the life of me imagine that there's anyone out there doing that same thing with my site every day. Like I said, we're really not exciting enough over here for that nonsense. 

5. Any romance in the city or walk of shames?
There's romance, but not in the city. Most of you probably know where that happens by now, cough, Charlotte, cough. But walk of shames have definitely happened in my five years of city life. EARMUFFS GRAMA! The best are those after Halloween and Santacon because of the obvious ridiculousness in outfit choices. Just picture a girl running down the street in the dead of winter trying to catch a cab come Sunday morning with nothing but red booty shorts and a tutu on.

6. Which sport would you do at the Olympics?
I'd go with gymnastics since I was a cheerleader back in the day, but their thigh muscles seriously give me the wide-eyed emoji look faster than you can say "Time Warner Cable sucks". Which is also my WiFi password, P.S., should you ever need it. But since gymnastics is out, the only other option would be ice skating. And I'm still mad at my mother for not signing me up for classes as a child.

7. What led you to nannying?
Well let's see. I started out in fashion working at Donna Karan because that was my major in college. Didn't like it. But then I needed to pay the ridiculous bill that was my rent every month, so I got some random job at an executive search firm as a head hunter. Didn't like that either. The clouds cracked and sent me a miracle while I was there in the form of me getting laid off. It sucked a bit at the time but is now THEE absolute best thing to ever happen to me in my work life thus far. 

Because that allowed me to take a month or so off to really figure out what I wanted to do for work. I didn't want to jump straight back into some random job that would solely exist in my daily life as a method to pay rent. Going to bed depressed every Sunday night because the work week is about to start is absolutely no way to live your life. 

So I decided to get back to my roots of when I worked at a daycare center during high school and college, which then led me to look for a nanny job. A couple days later, I was interviewing with a couple who had the cutest, most squishiest, most adorable three month old little boy there ever was. And now, two years later, I can honestly say it's been the single most rewarding experience I've ever had.

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