This Is Me, Take It Or Leave It

Has anyone seen that linkup going around called "I'm the kinda girl who"? Oh that's right, of course you did because everyone and their left shoelace has done it this week. And this makes me super happy because the sweetest of all the sweet tarts, Holly, from Hey Hollywood was the mastermind behind the whole thing. I sure do love me some Holly. I mean, I did design her blog for her and she did mail me one of my most favoritest sweatshirts ever just because she felt like it. Combine all of that with the fact that there are quite a few new faces around here since the launch of Blogcation and we have ourselves the perfect recipe for this needing to write this post.

>>Will somehow naturally wake up five minutes before my alarm goes off four out of five days of the week, just because I despise being jolted out of bed by such god awful iPhone alarm sounds. It's as if my brain is programmed to do it since I don't always have the same wake up time every morning. It's the oddest thing ever.

>>Will also never snooze said alarm if my computerized brain happens to not wake me before it goes off. And if you're sleeping next to me, you better not be snoozing your alarm either or I will cut you like butter.

>>May or may not choose the word "Holiday" for my future daughter's middle name just because I am that in love with anything and everything related to them. Holidays are my homeboy and getting festive is my forte. Sign me right on up for turning any ordinary something into cheerful magic.

>>Eats chicken wings by pulling the meat off the bone with her fingers instead of biting it off straight with her mouth. It's not to be all Heather Dubrow fancy pantsy, it's just because getting any of the flubby fat or the stringy veins in my mouth makes me want to hurl up an entire herd elephants.

>>Also thinks the best part of a chicken wing meal is the carrots, celery and blue cheese side that comes with it. I've been known to go out for just drinks yet still insist on ordering a side of this heavenly goodness.

>>Takes mirror selfies on random days, just because, even though 90% of them remain tucked away safe from public shame in my iPhone library. Don't ask me why, it just happens. Plus why are we so judgmental of selfie taking? If someone likes the way they look enough to post it for the world to see then great. Positive self esteem is something we should praise not hate.

>>Prefers a laid back and cheap sports bar over a crowded and pretentious, "a Bud Light will be $9" club any damn day, ever.

>>Doesn't understand why so many smart, educated, and grammatically correct individuals still seem to mess up the "so and so and I" vs "me and so and so" rule. For instance, if I was to host a link up with Meghan, I would blast it all over Twitter saying "Don't forget to link up with me and Meghan tomorrow" NOT "Don't forget to link up with Meghan and I tomorrow". Take out whoever you're with in the sentence and see if it makes sense. "Don't forget to link up with Meghan and I" is wrongo, as Mr. Grinch would say. Oh and don't even get me started on the people that say "Don't forget to link up for Meghan and I's linkup tomorrow". Just stick a straightjacket on me and call it a day.

>>Decides which bars to walk into based off of their sandwich board signs outside. I live for witty remarks.

>>Is so unbelievably anal and OCD that it's actually obnoxious. Take a look at the pink area in my contact tab under my blog picture. There is a one pixel sized white dot in the middle of it and it has been driving me absolutely bonkers for the past week. Someone prescribe me some meds quick.

>>Takes pictures holding all the things she wants to purchase in Target but doesn't need to purchase in Target as a method of self soothing.

>>Wants a puppy more than she wants world peace. Everyone who reads my blog knows this. Everyone who reads my blog also has full reason to basically call bullshit at this point since I've been blogging for two years (almost) and still don't have one. Blame my landlord. For now I'll just stick to Instagramming all of the fluffballs that I want so desperately.

>>Doesn't understand the obsession with any of the designer brand collaborations at Target or H&M. I  don't think I've liked a single one. Except for that Phillip Lim bag, that is. I guess I'll finally admit to liking that one even if the mass hysteria over it on Twitter made my eyes bleed.

>>Wishes her mother put her in ice skating lessons as a child. I should've been Gracie Gold, I just know it.

>>Didn't freak out as much as I should have when some random dude emailed me letting me know that he stumbled upon my pictures being used on some girl's Plenty of Fish dating profile. I hope that "artsy Caucasian hairdresser from Toowoomba, Queensland" had a good time playing catfish because she's now blocked from finding her true love. And P.S. why didn't that bitch invite me to Australia? I would've let her steal my face had she just bought me a plane ticket.

On that note, I'm going to go call Nev and see if I can get myself on MTV. Over and out.

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