If Life Were Perfect

First off, I would just like to give you all one hell of a "thank you times infinity" for the well wishes and words of encouragement on yesterday's post. You guys mean more to me than you know and your comments are what keep me hitting that darn publish button on posts like those. Oh and I'd also like to give those of you who said such sweet and nice things about my writing skills one hell of an "oh  my goodness gracious you must be on crack" type of response. Because I seriously still feel like I'm back in middle school needing to map out my intro, support, and conclusion paragraphs using the "outline of your hand" trick. Or was my school the only weird one that did that?

Anyway, thank you. Just thank you. 

And in true Two Thirds Hazel fashion we're going to switch gears from all things serious to all things frivolous, random, and (mostly) pointless. Because that's just how things work around here when your unspoken tag line goes something like "It doesn't get any more random than this." So we're going to throw it back old school and take a page out of the old blog book (Although now I can't seem to find the actual post so sorry if you weren't around that early in the game to know what I'm talking about). But it was the one where I pretended that my life was perfect for a hot minute and that I lived among the walls of my Pinterest boards. 

Because sometimes it's okay to just go ahead and act like you're living in your own little fairytale world. Scrolling through Pinterest is kind of like reading a book in the sense that you get transformed into another land without even realizing it. You picture yourself eating breakfast in that cozy nook, you imagine picking out the perfect pair of pumps from that twelve sizes too big walk in closet of yours, the darling little babes decked out in the cutest gear are the ones you'll be walking to preschool one day, and that pave band cushion cut two carat diamond engagement ring really will be slid on your finger as soon as the man of your dreams completes the perfect proposal. 

And as long as you don't head to the kitchen to pick up a knife after coming back down to reality and realizing that it (most likely) will never all be yours, then go ahead and dream a little dream girlfriend. Ain't not harm in that and that's exactly what I'm going to do today.

1) I'd have fresh flowers delivered to my house every other freaking day. Because I'm pretty certain you could stick a fresh bouquet of white peonies in the hands of a bum and he'd look like he could shoot rainbows out of his ass. They're such small details, yet they pack a pretty punch. But since life isn't perfect, I don't have unlimited amounts of Benjamin's trying to escape from my wallet to be spent on pointless things like flowers that will die in a few short days. So this is only a dream world desire since Lisa Vanderpump already reigns supreme. Maybe it's about time I finally go buy her book so I can learn her ways?

2) I'd have an office/desk space that made me swoon with creativity. Because, well, my apartment in this city isn't even big enough to have an extra closet, let alone an office. But I've become infatuated with desk spaces lately and would love more than anything to have a place to hang up and shelve all of the adorable prints and gadgets I come across. That whole using it as desk space thing would be pretty cool too seeing as how I tend to just write up posts and design blogs from the comfort of my couch in my underwear. Whatever works right? I'd just have to make enough bank in this world of mine so I could afford all of the office decor I've seen at Anthropologie lately. Swoon city.

3) I'd be gifted a puppy as a present. I think this has been a dream of mine ever since I could possibly remember. And I remember all the way back to when I was three years old, so I'd say that's a pretty long ass time to be dreaming. I don't really care when happens… Christmas, Birthday, Valentine's Day, freaking Ground Hog's Day for shit's sake. Just find a reason to give me a present, make that present a puppy (don't forget the bow!) and I will love you for all of eternity. But not as much as I'll love the ball of fluff.

4. I'd have reasons to throw dinner parties every other weekend and turn them into the most fabulous events ever. Because I think in my past life I was some crazy lady running around the city in Loubs carrying a Starbucks in one hand and a briefcase filled with piles on piles of inspiration for events in the other. What a perfect life it would be to have the funds to go crazy buying everything from color coordinated straws to the perfect set of chargers for your party. I adore gorgeous tables capes and parties put together by event coordinators. My most recent obsession is Sitting in a Tree events.

5) I'd be Audrey Hepburn. Okay that's a little dramatic, but I'm kind of not really kidding. In college you either had a Marilyn Monroe picture hanging on your dorm room wall, or you had Audrey. I obviously had the latter and it wasn't just because I'm a brunette. The girl most likely sweat straight class back in the day; why would one not want to be her?! If I could wear a strand of pearls every day for the rest of my life I probably would. P.S. I'm pretty excited about a new company I just discovered called Mesenso that will be launching their website soon for all things pearls. Sign me up!

6) I'd have the time, patience, and skill to cook actual meals. But when you live in New York City, you utilize your ability to open an iPhone app and hit "reorder" on your favorite Chinese take out meal without even having to get off the couch or look away from Say Yes to the Dress for more than two and a half seconds. Phew, that was a long sentence. But seriously, I need to take this one from "Pinterest Perfect" to "Real Life Perfect" in a jiffy because lord knows how often I'd eat this meal if I could only work up the courage to make it.

7. I'd have a freaking bar cart already.  Because what's more fun than decorating something that serves a purpose other than just being pretty? The possibilities are endless. Turn it into a pink and gold array of all things girly, change it out with red polka dotted straws and green tinted mason jars with some string lights wrapped around it for Christmas, design the whole thing around the theme of your party, or climb on top and take a little spin around the dining room if you find one with awesome wheels like the one below. My head is spinning; I need a damn bar cart already. Maybe even one that's antique and vintage inspired like all of these.

8. I'd have this shower. I don't think this one really requires much explanation other than the fact that if your shower is bigger than my entire bedroom then I may or may not need to kick you out of your house and move in.

9. I'd have a balcony that I could turn into an outdoor oasis. It would be filled with plants (that I'd keep alive because this is a perfect world and I'd know how to do that) pillows upon pillows, cozy blankets for snuggling, and lots of big bulbed string lights scattered all around. I'd play card games and drink wine and look at the stars and it would just be magical. That is until it rained...


And now that we've finally gotten to #10 I'm over this world of mine. I'd like to go back to re-heating leftover Chinese food, having to watch Vanderpump Rules on demand because I was an idiot that forgot to set the DVR, dreading going to the gym after work, dreading even more than I have to go outside into the frigid arctic temperatures of New York where my bones feel like they're being blow torched with dry ice, and looking forward to this week finally being over so that vacation can start.

Because even though I don't have all these fancy things to call my own… I woke up today, I'm healthy, I'm happy, I'm living. And that right there is perfect enough right now.