I'm Here, But Am I Really?

So most of you know by now that I have a best friend in Blogland. If you don't, well, then you must be new around here and if that's the case then A) Welcome to the mess of randomness I like to call Two Thirds Hazel and B) You should know that I'm really annoying because I talk about her (and puppies) (and eating) a lot. Phew, glad that's settled.
  
Her name is Whitney and she blogs over at that celebrity status of a blog called I Wore Yoga Pants to Work. I decided we should be friends as soon as I saw her blog title because that's about the only thing I ever put on this bod to go to work in. I like to call them "kid tested and dude approved". It's true, dudes love asses in yoga pants. Unless your ass is also wearing bikini cut undies with them. And if that's the case you need a wake up call and a trip to Victoria's Secret stat because, you child, must really be confused.


Anyway, I'm getting off topic. The point is that she's my bestie and that we always seem to sync our lives up together (and I'm not talking about the period kind of syncing) even though she's in Orlando laying by the pool all the damn time and I'm in New York City laying on my couch. Whatever, it's all the same when you have a Miller Lite in hand right? Right. I'm getting off topic again... Basically, whenever one of us goes through a transition in life the other tends to follow suit.

She became single. I became single.

She started going out and meeting new guys and having a drunken blast while doing. I started going out and meeting new guys and having a drunken blast while doing it.

And now she's currently seeing unicorns and her brain's all foggy because of it. And now I'm currently seeing unicorns and...you get the picture by now don't you?

We're just two beer mugs in a bar over here.


So if you want to know what's been going on in my head as of late then just go read the post she wrote today because I'm saying "ditto" all over it. Or don't because she basically cockadoodledoo teases you the entire time and never even gets to the point of why her brain is foggy in the first place. Womp womp. But anyway, if you read that then you might get somewhat of an idea as to why it's been even harder than usual for me to come here and write freely. Aka why I talked about sticking Oscar the Grouch bandaids on my tatas yesterday instead of discussing anything worthwhile. Cool story bro.

And now I just realized that I've once again talked about absolutely nothing worthwhile. I blame it on the fact that it's currently raining and I want nothing more than to snuggle on the couch with a certain movie about Minions right now. 

Oh and yeah, I also blame it on happy feelings. Like the kind you feel from Thanksgiving Eve straight on through to Christmas Day. Because that's obviously the best time of year ever and you feel like everything happy in the world has settled into your heart, danced around in circles, and shot sparklers off just for the f*ck of it. So basically, it's like a Katy Perry music video up in here.


And now that I've almost made you puke, I will remove myself from this sticky situation before I say something I'll regret. See ya tomorrow. Or maybe not. I may still be dancing.

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