Just Call Me Dr. Seuss

Guess who ended up finding some actual pictures from her birthday wine tour? This girl, unfortunately. Because by "actual" I mean a disastrous mess. And by "disastrous mess" I mean a damn good time. There's me throwing up the deuces (because I'm obviously so white it's unbearable), there's me calling my dad for my ID, there's me drinking the wine and looking terrified by it, me waving flags, and me dancing/dying/falling over? 


Then there's me playing with fire when I shouldn't be, fist pumping to a song that apparently made me really happy and of course kissing the random dog in one of the wineries. I told you I wasn't lying when I said I love birthdays...but let's move onto more pressing issues other than making a fool of myself. 

Poem writing. Say whaaat?

All credit for this blog idea goes straight to the brilliant Adriana from Dog Hair Is An Accessory. I told the Twitterverse that someone needed to come up with a topic for me to write about and she told me to make an acrostic poem out of my blog title. So...obviously I first had to look up what in the hell an acrostic poem was. Must've been making friendship bracelets during English class the day we learned what it meant. But as soon as I Googled I knew exactly what she was talking about. So I took the letters that spell out TWO THIRDS HAZEL and wrote a sentence about myself starting with each one. Enjoy.


Twenty something but looks like a twelve year old.

Would rather drink a beer in the sports bar in jeans and a tee than go to a club in a fancy dress and heels.

Only washes her roots with shampoo and her ends with conditioner, never the opposite.

Thinks that people who chew with their mouths open should be sent back to kindergarten.

Hates nail files because they give her the same sensation as nails on a chalkboard.

Isn't afraid to tell you the truth if you ask for her opinion. Why ask if you don't want honesty?

Rolls around on the floor with dogs like it ain't no thang.

Doesn't like when people drive the exact speed limit. 5MPH over isn't going to kill you, I promise.

Says she'll go to the gym but then chooses Mexican food and margaritas instead.

Has never been to the west coast (unless you count Hawaii?) and would really love to go.

Always organizes everything because clutter is chaos to her brain.

Zoo animals make her happy, especially the otters and sea lions and humongous human-like gorillas.

Elbow punches drunk chicks at crowded concerts if they're sloptarts and continuously bump into her.

Loves celebrating holidays and loves the changing of every season, especially summer to fall.

Woo, I did it! Talking about myself in the third person is just about the most awkward thing I've ever done and this is also the last time you'll ever find me writing poems, but it was definitely still fun. Try it out for yourself. That is unless your blog title has 37 characters...and in that case just give up and go take a nap.

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But before you do that I have someone for you to meet. She's pretty much all over the blogosphere so you probably know her already but just in case you don't you should probably meet Lisette from Northern Belle Diaries. And then you should go check out her blog because we swapped spots today and I'm playing over there while she's here.

1. If you had to be stuck in one season for the rest of your life, which one would it be? I would have to say Spring! All the pretty flowers are in bloom! My favorite are the tulips, daffodils, hyacinths and the blooming cherry trees. Plus, there's no risk of developing a frozen booger 'stache since the winter's over. And, there aren't any exhibitionists taking advantage of the hot weather and blinding me. But mostly, I love the flowers. Autumn would be my second favorite.

2. What was your favorite cartoon growing up? I had soooo many different favorite cartoons growing up. Pre-English speaking Lisette loved Heathcliff! After that, it's a three-way tie between Animaniacs, Scooby Doo, and Aladdin. Yeah, I know. Old school.

3. If you could hop on a plane tomorrow and go anywhere in the world where would it be? For an adventure or pleasure? Hmmm. Somewhere exotic like the Maldives for pleasure. Gorrrrrgeous! If it's an adventure I'm after, I'd say Seville! I'd love to see Spain and then venture into Morocco. And, duh, I'd take you with me!

4. See more of what Lisette has to say hereBlog :: Twitter :: Facebook :: Pinterest :: Instagram

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