The Things I Did This Weekend

Well I didn't think I'd actually make it here today. Girlfriend is hung flippin' over. We can give thanks to Yankee Stadium for that one. But Whitney texted me saying "stop being hungover and write a post" so I'm doing just that. Except for I'm going to keep things real short and sweet. And by short and sweet I mean I'm going to upload some pictures and call it a day so I can get back to sucking water out of my Tervis like a pregnant woman in July.

I babysat. Aka I played with a cutie patootie four month old little nugget, ordered some Thai food, watched six hours of Say Yes to the Dress and got paid for it. I'd like to call that one successful Friday night. Plus he has the cutest nursery I've ever seen. Which helped me decide that I want to be a nursery decorator when I grow up.

It has been hotter than ball sack here in Manhattan so the morning was spent romping around (literally - just take a look at the outfit) Bed Bath & Beyond with a frozen coolatta in hand. No one looked at me funny for taking selfies in the mirror aisle either. Nope.

After that I headed to Astoria to go tan my cheeks at my friend's apartment. I think I just about melted all day long. It was Africa outside. Which is why I was hugging her six dollar sprinkler like my life depended on it.

After acquiring some pretty sick tan lines I trucked it back to Manhattan to go to the little man's first birthday party. This is about when I decided that I want to pretend to turn one again for my party this year. There was a tunnel and a parachute and bubbles and blow up froggies. There were about seven thousand babies there also so obviously I was in some sort of heaven. 

Later that night I met back up with all the girls to go out. Apparently I was on a navy and white striped nautical kick the entire day. I don't hate it. Please ignore the picture quality going on here. The bartender apparently only excelled at giving us free shots and not his photography skills. I don't hate this either.

This is what you look like after free shots and frozen margs. 

And this is what you look like the next morning. At the same outfit...ordering a bowl. I keep it classy kids. P.S. it's pronounced Chi-polt-lay NOT Chi-polt-tay. Nothing really irks me more than when people pronounce it that way. Get it right get it tight.

After a long day spent on the couch watching the RHONJ marathon I headed to the Yanks vs. Red Sox game. With a Red Sox fan. Ew. I told him he was going to get beer thrown on him (and I would probably be the one throwing it) so he decided against wearing an actual Sox shirt. I called him a pussy, don't you worry.

For some reason they decided to delay the game due to rain. But it wasn't even raining. I felt drunk right then and there. The original start time was 8:00pm and the delayed start time pushed us back closer to 9:00. So we drank eleventy thousand beers at The Dugout across the street before going into the stadium because $12 beers inside is redonkulous.

Those eleventy thousand beers are why you just got the most boring weekend recap post in the history of weekend recap posts. But guess what, guess what, guess what...MY PARENTS ARE GETTING A PUPPY! A little baby yellow lab, on June 23rd. Guess who's going to go home and steal it...?

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