Things I Think While Wining


If you missed Part One of this fun new game I like to play then shame on you at least you're here now. These are the types of posts that are born from me snuggling up on my couch, dranking some wine, and watching crap tv. If a thought comes into my head - I write it down here. And that is how the game is played. It's as simple and easy as that. Let's get to it.

1. I'm getting fed up that I constantly lose my place in my Facebook feed. I never know where I left off and can never tell what I have or haven't seen because half of the crap on there is Instagram pics. I get confused to all heck because I'm like "I know I saw that plate of fresh fruit with a heart doodled around it but did I see it on Insta or on here...hmmm, you better answer correctly or you might miss out on yet another engagement announcement or potty training update." And that right there would be some sort of tragedy my friends.

2. Oh and speaking of Facebook - this new trend of making Facebook pages for INFANTS?! Umm no.  Twenty seven and half times over - no. You should not have a Facebook account before you reach Middle School let alone one before you've even taken your first shit in a diaper. Stop with the mayhem.

3. And one other thing about Instagram - I like my Instas square and plain. No heart shapes, no circle shapes, no doodles, no excessive shiny sparkles. I'm a Grinch about it and I'm perfectly okay with that.

Moving away from my thoughts on social media...because I do think about other things in life. I promise.

4. Ring Pops are damn good. So are Hint of Lime Tostitos. I should probably make myself a real dinner. Then again...maybe not.

5. Obviously Meredith Grey isn't going to die on the table or turn into a vegetable. Let's get real people. Jackson saving this little girl with one pink shoe on though? He could probably die so Shondra Rhimes you better not kill off the hottest man on this show, you hear me?! P.S. KISS THE DAMN GIRL KAREV.

6. I'm not ready for summer. (say whaaaaat?) Yes it's true. I actually despise being hot. You know how I've been complaining about allergies? Yeah well I'll continue to complain just as much about being muggy and sticky and greasy and not being able to blow dry my hair without passing out too. I'm a real peach aren't I? I'm pretty sure my heat level is always ten degrees higher than the average human in the summer as well as ten degrees colder than average in the winter. I thrive in mild temperatures. Like some sort of bacteria. Give me 65 and mostly sunny and you can get me to do just about anything.

7. I get ridiculously freaked out whenever I'm around insane people. For instance the dude I came in contact with today who had white paint all over his head and was screaming obscenities at the bus driver to "Just go the eff already"? Yeah, I assume he's about to whip out a machete and hack my head off. I lived though so we're good.

8. These 19 year olds wreaking havoc on our world piss me the hell off. The suspect of the Mother's Day shooting is 19, as is the one from the Boston bombings. You are 19 years old, go do a keg stand or get arrested for pissing in public. Stop the mass violence!

9. It's rather ridiculous that I still take my laundry home at the age of almost 24. And I do mean "take it home" as in on a five hour bus ride from NYC to Ithaca. That is just sad. But what would be more sad is hanging out in a public laundromat in the city to do it. Yeah no thanks. I'd rather sit on the machete wielding guy's lap for an hour.

10. I do not want to "come and get it" Selena Gomez so please, I beg of you, get out of my head! I would like to back my azz up with Whitney though because it's Friday. Hollaaa! This one goes back to my cheerleading days when we would all line up on the court to welcome the basketball players in for warm ups. Nine out of ten times they would come in to Til I Collapse by Eminem. Anytime I ever hear the song now I am immediately taken back to those days in the gym. It's so hardcore, I love it. If I ever worked out, I'd do it to this song. But since I don't it can just hang out on my blog with me while I stuff my face.


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